A Small Break.

I'm taking a break from Facebook.  I feel like I'm losing all sense of humanity, and I'm feeling incredibly "stabby" lately.  I'm weary to the bone with status updates about perfect babies, things people's babies have done that are not as funny as their parents believe, unrealistic accomplishments and the bragging.  I'm tired of the requests for help and advice, only to get defensive replies when advice is offered that the person may not want to hear.  I am not willing to let myself think that these attitudes are OK. When I find out through Facebook about activities that my family and friends have done, when I may happen to not be a part of it.. I end up unjustifiably feeling left out.

....It's OK for things to happen without me being there...

I have been feeling this way for a while now. It started when I read a status update of a local lady carrying on about not getting to enjoy a sno-cone because a "stupid" State Trooper pulled her over.  Would she still have posted that if she knew that she was Facebook friends with that sweet Trooper's wife? The good of social networking far outweighs the bad (for every snipe or rant there are five sweet family photos that make me smile), but I seem to remember the bad too often.

I'm also finally tired of feeling like my life is part of a contest for display.  I’m finding that what Facebook is really great for, is BRAGGING, and that’s been a really difficult thing for me to deal with. I’m not a jealous person, but I find that seeing people posting about their new cars, stay at home mom crafts and get togethers, vacations, babies, and ginormous houses causes me to start comparing my life to others. And I’m guilty of it too- it’s hard not to post exciting news about your latest accomplishments or how awesome your kid is. Maybe I’m just being sensitive, and I should be able to applaud someone rather than covet what they have, but regardless, I just need a time-out from this hamster wheel.  I have a very sweet family, a new home, and all of our critical belongings are in perfect working order.

So, I think there's a lot of value in taking an occasional break from too much connectedness. Facebook is undoubtedly a time-suck, and I've been feeling a bit overwhelmed by it the past couple of weeks, like I'm too involved in people's lives and not present enough in my own. I just need to get away from it for a few days and refocus on the important people around me, rather than the poop/pee/sleep schedule of an acquaintance that lives 4 hours away and has either two or three children, whose names I could not tell you if I spent a year thinking about it.

Now, by no means do I think I am so important that I need to announce my departure for a social networking vacation- but I just needed to get out how I'm feeling.

I have an email address if you need me :)  Oh, and Granny Skeet- I will still post pictures of EK here for you.   :D

Screw You, Mom, and Other Triple P Adventures.

I guess EK was pissed at me after I blogged about her photo session antics yesterday. She definitely made me pay.

It all started in a nice warm bubble bath together. Never trust a toddler in the bath tub. They tend to poop. When they do, it's gross. It's even more gross when you're relaxing, and all of a sudden your water reeks and turns a nice yellow-brown.

 I fly out of the tub and start drying off as quickly as I can, so I can get EK out of her turd bath. The next thing I know, she's got one in her hand and is eyeing it lovingly, like she would her favorite candy bar. Oh, and she's sitting on another turd. I grabbed the turd and ran it to the toilet. This was a 9.9 on a 10 point scale of stinky crap. On the way to the toilet, I puke. Eww. Whatever.

I still need to get my turdling toddler out of the bath, so I suck it up and get EK out. She's all happy, happy, happy, and I'm all, 'Oh, lord I have to fish out four more stinky turds from the tub, AND THEN clean up my own vomit."  EK sees me getting a huge wad of toilet paper to grab the turds, and plays with the TP while I'm collecting.

She's laughing hysterically. SHE'S PEEING IN THE FLOOR. SHE'S RUNNING AND PEEING IN THE FLOOR. She slips, right into the puke.

It's just not the holidays without someone throwing up.
So, what do you do when your baby is covered in a Triple "P" mixture, and there are turds in your bath tub?

If you're me, you laugh. And laugh. And laugh. Oh, and curse your husband for working nights during this turd adventure. Then, you have a nice glass of wine.

Taking Pictures of a Toddler Is Hard. Just Ask My Mom.

There a couple of things I can think of that I would rather do than attempt family photos again in the next few years.

A few of those things are:

1) Gouge my eyes out with a dull pencil
2) Drink the mystery milk from the sippy cup I found under the couch
3) Live on the South Pole
4) Lay over the threshold at Target at 9pm Thanksgiving night

Seriously. When did it get so hard to get a cute picture of my family? Ryan and I are decent looking in my view. EK is gorgeous. We should look awesome, right?
  My poor mom. She is a really good photographer. However, her subject has been on the wild side the last few sessions. Halloween was a blur, literally. The girl stormed through the pumpkin patch so quickly. Christmas photos, wow. We took them on our land to make things "easier". About the only thing easier about this was getting there. While she got a great shot for cards and whatnot, check out the awesome rejects.

All kinds of awesome.

EK, off to explore poison ivy and whatnot.

I actually like this one.

Free and wild!

Expert baby wranglers.

Yay, tetanus. Oh, we got a cat. EK and I rescued her after gymnastics, she was whoring around downtown.

Yes!

We are a very loving family. Even this attractive cat.

At least we had a good time.

Hmmph. End of session.

Well, Mom did get SOME adorable shots. Case in point-

Aren't they the sweetest?

2 out 3 smiles isn't bad.

We may send a picture of the dog next year if EK is still in wild mode.  Newly married couples and couples with newborn, snuggly, tinies: enjoy your super-model Christmas cards.
The crap hits the fan once the kid's feet hit the ground.

Lately.

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii.  I'm still here. Things that have happened that are somewhat interesting:

A)  I've changed jobs.
   I did a 180, and I'm teaching Pharmacy Tech at the local community college. I love love love it.

B)  I'm a red head.
    Interesting.

C) EK has HAIR. She looks like a little girl.  My baby is long gone.

D)  We are a one dog family as of yesterday. Hopefully our playtime will be a little more enjoyable!  Jake is still holding down the fort.

E)  Ryan and I have been practicing our shooting. Scary.

F) Ryan participated in a gator lasso-ing a while back. I wish I had been there, so totally cool.

G)  My sister and I became obsessed with mullets for a brief, fleeting, moment.

H)  I joined a Fantasy Football league this year... ack.

I) Nothing else!


Here's a photo dump-

Wordless Wednesday- Father's Day Edition

There's not much that EK loves more than her daddy. I can't blame her.

Shop House Tour: Kitchen

I'm a horrible cook, but I do love my kitchen. It's a really good reflection of our style, I think, and it's one of my favorite parts of our house. It is open to our living room, only separated by a bar. That's where we eat... no room for a table!

Looking at the kitchen from our living room.

View walking out of the bedroom.

Some of my flea market finds to attempt at decorating the insane amount of space between cabinet and ceiling.

"Cribs" style. We always have water, milk wine, and ketchup.

 The only pleasant smell in the kitchen recently..

Creative baby-proofing.

I'm thrown in the mix with Bubble Guppies... can't win 'em all. We really never use this board, but it's so cute!

We're linked up with Kelly's Korner for her Show Us Your Life Home Tour.

World's Worst Toddler Toy (And Why My Temper May Be a Little Short)

 I loathe a particular kid toy. Everyone says it's a classic, a must buy, that every kid they ever raised had this toy. I was skeptical, the appeal lacking in a set of wheels with a ball filled globe that goes "Pop pop pop" every time an innocent, unsuspecting toddler takes it for a whirl. Have you figured out what it is yet?

Yeah, it's that thing. The pop-pop vacuum of ruptured ear drums and death. Ryan fell for it, and let her buy it on one of their Daddy/EK Wal-Mart runs.

...I really should monitor those more closely....

    I came home from the office one day to see my precious, once quiet little girl pushing this "classic" toy around.  That was day the day she became a true blooded toddler. She pushes it around, and if that's not enough, she sings yells while making my ears bleed. Heaven forbid you ask her to stop, then she goes full on tantrum on you.
   Kids love the thing. You know, we all like to vacuum for hours on end... for fun. So the pop-pop death trap has stayed around for a while. It's not even a noise I can tolerate for the sake of her learning and development, just an obnoxious pop-pop-pop-pop. Over and over and over again. It's only appealing to the munch when (A) I'm on the  phone (B) Ryan worked the late night shift and we are trying to play quietly and (C) I've had an exceptionally annoying day at work.

I tried to hide it in the shop one day, but she found it and promptly cried until it was brought back inside. Now it sits, waiting until my next phone call to send me running to a "quiet" room.

What's the worst kid toy at your house? Want to trade?

EK, Drink Your Veggies.

Ryan and I are trying desperately to eat better. It is so hard for us to plan meals and eat healthy foods when we find ourselves sitting in vehicles the majority of each day. It's just the nature of the job, for a traveling RN and a Highway Patrol Officer. You eat a lot. You're bored. Everything sounds good.
  One thing never sounds good to me, and it's vegetables. I like salads, broccoli, squash, beans, but anything else green kind of grosses me out. Especially green beans. I get a gag reflex anytime they go in my mouth. I pray to the Dear Lord every night that the only kind of green beans I have to eat ever again are the ones that my father in law rolls in bacon and drenches in butter and brown sugar.
  I love the V8 juice that is the fruit/veggie blend, but it certainly doesn't take the place of a meal full of fruits and vegetables. One of my friends recently was talking about smoothies she makes that incorporate both fruits AND green vegetables. I had to try it, and I was very pleasantly surprised. The one I came up with was delicious, and I actually crave them now. EK loves them, too, so I have all the more reason to make them.

The ingredients:
-About 3/4 cup Greek Yogurt (I prefer the Vanilla flavor, it makes for a sweeter smoothie!)
-1 peeled banana
-about a cup of strawberries (can do frozen and skip the ice listed later)
-Several chunks of fresh pineapple
-a little coconut milk (I've tried two different kinds, Silk is in the refrigerated section, another kind was just on the shelf)
-about 5 or 6 chunks of ice
- Last but not least, a heaping handful of fresh spinach leaves. You can use baby spinach or just whatever kind you have.

I've heard of people adding frozen blueberries in smoothies, also replacing the ice, but I'm not really a blueberry fan.

Layer the ingredients in your blender, cover your ears, and blend on medium-high until everything is nice and smooth.

Now you're ready to go! Looks disgusting, tastes good.

Spinach Banana Stawberry Pineapple Smoothie=EK approved.

I love using this as a substitute for my typical  fast food breakfasts. It curbs my sweet tooth, keeps me away from the doughnut shop, and really feels me up. I need more ideas for sneaky ways to eat more fruits and veggies! What are you favorite easy, healthy meals and snacks?